"Brian, is that how you get women?"--Andy
"Me? I don't get women."--Brian
"I just touched your leg and I'm not into that tonight."--Maggie
"Oh yeah? Well I thought you were gay when I first met you."--Lauren to Mike
"What's more important--tampons or God?"--Matt
"That's not as cute as I thought it was. I liked it better without the face sucking."--Maggie
"Life's it's own foot."--Mike (about poetry)
"He's getting old. He's probably a pedophile by now."--David H.
"If you grabbed other men's genitals, you'd be from Michigan."--Jess
"Christians are the horniest people EVER."--Wendi
"Speaking of going to the bathroom, I learned a new trick."--Eric
"What's with people spitting their gum in the urinals?"--Jack
"She was a hooker--but I don't think she was naked."--Dr. Shaw
"He's my adopted twin brother."--Joe
"Joe, I love you."--Amber
"I love me too."--Joe
"I'm so happy, I could moon someone."--Cassie
"Mary had a little lamb whose fleece was white as chicken."--Amber
"Oh my gosh! It says 'poop' in Japanese!"--Thomas
"My entire life is a hyperbole."--Emily
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