Stress+finals+lack of sleep= what you see here

"There's a dumb hat on my tray"--Amber (about an upside-down ice cream cone)

"This is your brain.  This is your brain on a dumb hat."--James

"I want to name my first son Homosasis Pubitus."--Mike H.

"He's on my poop star list right now."--Jess

"We are the Scotsmen who say 'Baa!'"--Thomas

"Beth is not a leg of mutton."--Jack

"Kristin, don't chicks dig strong armpit muscles?"--David S.

"I always know who I'm eating."--Mary N.

"He's moving 'cause he's like 'I've gotta get Jesus some more diapers.  There's no rest for Joseph.'"--Thomas 

"Do you dream of Mozart whipping you?"--Jess

"That's like Diarrhea in your head all day long."--Seth

"Baby Jesus is gonna be in the movie.  Why would there be a gratuitous sex scene?"--Lauren

"Especially not with that bald haired guy over there."--Jess

"Eric, you're like a big, cuddly sex offender."--Jeremy L. 

"Don't say 'naked ladies, naked ladies, naked ladies,' and then don't show us any naked ladies."--Dr. Shaw

"My head is quite fragrant."--Amelia

"Someday when your nose is flat like this, a boy will come along and sweep you off your nose."--Amelia to Cassie

"Their hands were not predestined to touch my girlfriend's butt."--Justin

"I am your muslim girlfriend.  You may kiss me, but only through the veil."--Amelia

"I'm just not feeling the love from the men lately."--Jess

"The new hoover vacuum--it sucks more than you."--Aaron

"That's like saying he's the ugly version of the elephant man."--Jeff

"At least if I freeze and die, I'm going to heaven."--Amber

Some professor Quotes from Fall 2000

"Can someone email me and remind me about satan?"--Prof. Ruth Huston

"I'll call him up and have him email you."--Justin

"Let's take a detour with Satan!"--Prof. Ruth Huston

"Don't get tacos on my couch!"--Dr. Shaw

Awkwardness

"You'd 'pick up' a girl at Dairy Queen?"--Trisha

"Hey.  That's where they treat you right."--Jeremy

"Don't put off till tomorrow what you can pretend to do today."--Jack

"Boys on the side...of my barn"--??(from a list of 17 titles rejected for 'Twister')

"Yeah, I'm pretty much a-sexual."--Trisha

"Thomas is my favorite caveman"--Jeremy L.

"I have many opportunities to work for Microsoft because of my ice cream cone making skills."--Brian

"I always thought that was an odd name--Mr. McFEELY."--Jeremy L.

"I guess making out at the table is bad etiquette."--James

"with your boss."--Jack

"I pretty much lust after anything that moves or breathes"--Jeremy L.

"Your head doesn't go there.  That's a big bozo no-no."--Cassie

"He's got bigger breasts than I do, and that's just scary.  Then he'd walk out in just his underwear..."--Jess

"Every part of the female form looks like it's supposed to be there.  With us, it's just like...this THING."--Jeff

"My brother peed on my a couple of times"--Jeremy L.

"Something is shooting out of my dog!"--Jess

"Jesus would have had sex in church if he was married."--Eric

"I like Florida because it makes the United States look like it's peeing on Cuba."--Eric

"We should praise God for giving us the ability to poop because it's fun!"--Eric

"Thank God for giving us computers we can use on the crapper."--Jeff

"Can I touch your Uvula?" --Jeff

"Conform, dang it!"--Jack